both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Oh god it's open bar.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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