Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
