so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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