how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
