i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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