I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
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