Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
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