Her vagina should come with caution tape.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
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Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
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No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
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