I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
