I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
She just used a chaser for red wine.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
