I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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