You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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