Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
