is your mom at the bar?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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