He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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