I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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