She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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