Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
