I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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