question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
