I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
