I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
