dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
