his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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