tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
