Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize