No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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