He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize