You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
