You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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