It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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