last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize