I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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