im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
