Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
