woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize
