Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
