dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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