More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
