Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I enjoy the company of your penis
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
