Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
