whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize