If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Randomize
