You can't motorboat a personality
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
