Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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