just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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