You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize