You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
i now understand why vodka
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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