so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
