why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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